Dealing with messy house guests in a positive way

Here's how you can deal with messy house guests in a constructive way

Festive and holiday seasons are tricky, what with various friends and relatives converging at your precious home. While our culture teaches us to regard guests as god (Atithi Devo Bhavah), what do you do when guests scatter their luggage, throw wet towels on the beds, stain the couch, grumble and leave a trail of soiled tissues, clothes, wet knickers, smelly socks and sandy shoes all over your house?

Recently, my partner and I played host to six adult guests at our beautiful home in Goa. While we were excited to see them, we found ourselves exhausted from cooking, cleaning, touring and entertaining. We soon realised that our guests fell in distinct categories and learnt how to deal with each.

Lazy couch potatoes
Entertaining people at home comes with a certain amount of stress. Selfish and lazy visitors insist on having things their own way at the expense of others. Some guests consider your home a resort. One guest kept tinkering with the fan regulator and TV remote. He lazed around all day, kept the TV blaring, refused to clean his mess, left the screen door ajar and next morning complained of mosquito menace. Worse, he thought his behaviour was acceptable. "The best way to handle such people is to be polite, yet firm. Invite them to help you do household chores. They may consider it menial but it saves your house from being turned into a pigsty," says actor Sabira Merchant, who is also the country's top corporate finesse groomer and etiquette trainer.

Constant whiners
Habituated complainers rarely have a word of appreciation. "Can't you replace these lampshades with tube lights? Why can't you buy an AC? Gosh, these Goan houses are so brightly coloured? Is everything so laid-back here?" But that's what makes Goa so unique, I muttered under my breath, asking our guest to join me for a stroll on the Baga beach. "You could either tell them politely about your social status and limitations on welcomes and protests in a matterof-fact way or be crafty. If your guest is nagging about an AC or a washing machine, just ask him/ her to buy you one," Niranjan Prakash, practice consultant and corporate trainer at Tata Management Training Centre, Pune.

Incorrigible slobs
Guests who fall in this category make a mess in your house and expect you to clean after them. I still shudder when I think of a guest, who nibbled all day long and left her dirty dishes on the kitchen counter or in the sink for us to clean, fully aware that we do not have a domestic help. She brushed her hair on the bed, used tissues to wipe her face and tossed them everywhere. Once, when I asked her to make her bed, she even had the nerve to tell me, "Don't overreact. It's not messy." "Ask them to help you with the cleaning. You could also sit down and have an honest chat with them without making it personal," says Merchant.

The perfect stranger
One of our favourite guests is a Pune-based drama therapist, who is neat, helpful, and genuinely interested in spending quality time with us. Not only does he strike interesting conversations, he keeps the guest room clean and also lends a helping hand in the kitchen. He uses water sparingly and switches off the fans and lights when not in use. Needless to say, he is our perfect guest and is always invited to stay with us.

Be a good house guest
- Inform your host about your travel plans in advance
- Do not scatter your luggage in the common space
- Always make your bed before heading for breakfast
- Never leave your dirty dishes in the sink for others to clean
- Restrain your children if they are noisy and destructive
- Flush the toilet and put the lid down (Guys: lift the seat and then pee)
- Turn off the lights, TV, fan and water tap when not in use
- Allow your hosts to have some time to themselves
- Help during mealtimes: Set the table, clean the plates, clear trash
- Arrange your own transport if your arrival/departure is at odd hours

thanks:http://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/